2013 Championship Preview

It is that amazing time of year folks: Hanukkah is over so all the little Jewish kids are back to their self loathing drudgery, everyone else is reaching the climax of Christmas anticipation, and another Fantasy Football season is coming a close. The cream has risen to the top and the bad apples spoiled the rest of the bunch.  Two teams stand above mountain of corpses that used to be Natrone Means' Business Outing: The King of QUEEN!S and Heisenberg's Heros (sp). Everyone will sleep soundly knowing that they will not be bombarded by trade inquiries the next day by JJ and that Zach's team layed a stinker in the Playoffs. Toph's Chicago Goon Squad put up a whopping 170 points in the first round of the playoffs, but in his matchup with the #1 side his team came back to earth while till putting up a respectable 113 points, not enough to upset the top dawg. Dont forget to watch Sunday Brunch Phil but an absolute HURTIN on in the consulation bracket.

The King of QUEEN!S dominated the regular season locking up the number one seed weeks ago, featuring a 9 game winstreak snapped by none other then your boy Sunday Brunch Phil. The WR heavy squad has come through in the playoffs proving that no one needs RBs when you have Tony Romo's kicker in the month of December. Mr. Camarato also wins the title of having mysterious punctuation in the middle of his team name... hey, if it aint broke dont fix it.  WAR EAGLE

Heisenberg's Heros danced into the championship on the back of Fantasy Hero Jamaal Charles and his legendary 5 touchdown performance. Mr. Miller's team currently features 4 quarterbacks: Matt Ryan, Andy Dalton, Alex Smith, and Ryan Tannehill,  too bad he played the only one who scored than 20 points this week. Time to lay off the bay breezes down at the Hurricane Club in West Palm Scotty if you wanna take home the trophy this year. The Heros also win the award for caring more about punctuation than spelling in their team name.

Good Luck to the Competitors... winner gets a 2 day supply of EatTribal meals supplied by the Big Hairy Mammoths and discounted shares of both Arian Foster and Vernon Davis in IPO version 2.0 using the promo code: INJURYTUESDAY thanks to Natrix

PS - no mammoths were injured in the making of the Tribal Meals

PPS - I ran this blog through anonymous proxy server mirrors routed through Iran and Pakistan so the Ess-Ee-Sea cant get us for insider trading ;)

PPPS - Gonna throw make these pics into some whacka flocka fire flames tshirts and sell em on Barstool for $45  + free shipping. Hit me up on my cellie if you wanna get in on this deal of the century.

Fantex on Day 1 of Arians IPO

Picture me Rollin

Choo-Chooooo, Casazza victory train coming thru.

.23 MARGIN OF VICTORY?

IT'S ALLLLL COMING UP CASAZZA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WANTED... alive!

Zerman heres to you,

how much you guys shell out to davey pageviews and the rest of barstool for the shameless ads they called "blogs"?

http://www.barstoolsports.com/chicago/super-page/company-called-fantex-now-lets-you-buy-stock-in-arian-foster-and-other-professional-athletes/

http://www.barstoolsports.com/nyc/super-page/company-allowing-you-to-buy-stock-in-athletes/

Saw this about the old boss man... you hang that bad boy?

http://www.barstoolsports.com/chicago/super-page/of-coure-vince-mcmahon-has-a-dinosaur-skull-on-his-wall-of-course/

and I found this while looking for slave trade pics... so fitting and now everything makes so much more sense!

http://incogman.net/2010/09/the-shocking-jewish-role-in-slavery/

EL OH EL City, Population: Me!

Seasons starts off with a Week 2 trade, unheard of for this league!

KIDS BACK...

HE'S DONE IT!

My Fellow Americans,

         I would like to first address my opponent... Christoph, it was a good fight out there on the digital gridiron.  The points fluctuated quite a bit through Sunday and Monday and at no point did i ever think i had it in the books.  Isn't that what we do this for in the end, the rush of getting that fumble on the one yard line by specifically joique bell  or the fumble by mikel leshoure on the 20 to prevent detroit from scoring right up until the last minute of the game when that harm could be done and still allow the kid to win.  Or is it the bears defense, tophs favorite team squeeking out the victory for his opponent.  I mean no disrespect in this victory speech whatsoever, let me get that across.  What a wild game for what would have determined first place.  29 strong points from rodgers, but he struck back with 27 from vincent jackson (way to trade him ed).  from then on it was almost even going into monday night projections.  I gotta say i needed a lot to happen and not happen yesterday and luckily i was albe to have it all happen for me.  For that i wanna thank God, and this great country for allowing me to forge past the competitive edge and process this victory.  Let's be honest the smear campaign worked.  By friday toph , we know you were nervous, not about your team not performing but about josh gordon, frank gore's 18 pnt start to the week , your chicago bears d n aaron rodgers.  I think as soon as we all saw this "Win or Lose, I still have JJ's ultimate" and made 2 last transactions to change his fortune, we knew Toph had been shook, like a half weight crook. I now stand at first place staring down at the Hebrew Hammer as i lead him in points despite our similar records and have BTALBSALLSTARS or what ever new name he'll come up with, i say  Wayne's World - party time, excellent, rising in the midst.  Toph... your still a contender but i think you learned one valuable lesson this week.  You don't under any circumstances rip a team for their starting lineup the first day of the week, cause that lingering thought will strike back with great vengeance.  It is a rule ive battled my whole fantasy career, n im glad to pass it onto you and teach you a thing or two about how to correctly manage not only your team, but your luck.  God bless America, God Bless Mr. Rodgers Hood and God bless monteray jack cheese for being so delicious on crackers. 

Your Catalyst Liason
Manager of Mr. Rodger's Hood.

James J. DeSimone

"Bottle of Red, Bottle of White, It all depends on your appetite"
billy joel